It’s really odd how friends can pass in and out of your life. There are people I used to spend almost every day with, and now we never interact. I’m not talking about friendships with bad endings. It’s just that people change over time. There are a lot of factors that play into it, I know, but at a distance it’s just weird to think about. I can think of someone who I used to talk about everything with, and now us interacting at all is a rarity. Yet at the same time, other friends can move far away, and we’ll still be in frequent contact. What’s important, though, is that although I have friends that I don’t communicate with much, I know that if I ever needed them they’d be there for me without even having to think about it. As would I for them.

Sometimes I think of my life as a television series. Where sometimes an actor or actress doesn’t renew their contract, and so their character is no longer a main part of the series. They become more of a reference and sometimes make guest appearances. The analogy goes so much further. However, I’m told that I think of things within a cinematic framework too often.

As I was heading home this evening, I found myself wandering away from my house on foot. I walked around Lawrence for a good couple of hours. I had lots of time to think. I was able to take in the beauty of the things around me. Most importantly though, I was able to feel. It’s too easy to walk through life just going through the motions, not remembering to feel. I’m the type of person who likes to busy working hard on something all the time, but I’m also very driven by my heart. You can see where that may cause an issue at times. Tonight was an inspiration. I’m not saying that I go through life without emotion. But sometimes I lose touch. It’s always good to reconnect.

Shots ring out in blind stellar night time
Town lights come alive like a land mine
Eyes wide up in five second intervals
Unpredictable, life’s a miracle

I have now completed 4 years of college. 8 semesters. It’s all gone by so fast. By December I’ll have have my BGS in Film and Media Studies. I’m pretty sure I’ll be taking one extra class next Spring to really be able to focus on improving my skills and utilizing this department while I still can. After that, I am rather unclear on what I’ll do. I’ll probably leave the KC area. I’m sure I’d love my work with any type of job in the industry, but what I’d really be passionate about is something that reaches out to the community in some way. I’m just not sure right now how all the pieces could fit together.

I love being a student. I love being a film major. I love the friends that I have made here. It’ll be sad when the real world takes me away from it…but that’s as far as I’m going to venture down that thought path right now.

The last three weeks have been crazy. I slept very little and spent many many hours in production or post production. No semester would be complete without some all-nighters at Oldfather Studios. But I love doing it all. Life is exciting.

It’s odd to not be working on any projects right now. It’s just in my DNA to always be working hard on something. Hopefully I’ll be doing some production work this summer. I have my job at the dorm, and I’ve applied for another theatre position.

Graduating in 4 years is like leaving the party at 11pm