Wow! Today was awsome! I cleaned out my car (well almost) the social worker came by around the time I was doing it. I cannot seem to make my trunk work… grrr… oh well. I was not being sarcastic when I said that I had a good day. It was nice out. I felt a ton better. I think I’ve got my self-esteem issues under control.
But man! I need to get out and do more. I actually enjoyed cleaning my car, lol! I put in some more oil, gas, and radiator fluid… there must be a leak in that dang hose! I KNOW IT TO BE TRUE! Ah well. I’ve got way too much engergy today for being sick yesterday. I heal quickly! I want to go play something like baseball. I really think I’m going to do better this year. I have more confidence. I haven’t gone out and played any, but I have confidence. That’s all you need. Confidence and a little TRY on the side.
I am going to wake up every morning and point out one good acpect of my life. Like my ability to work my a$$ off, lol. I am quite proud of that. I never just give up. I try, and I love that. I was like utterly deppresed on Monday. It was bad, but look at me now! I’m like normal again! I’m the happy me, the fun me. I need to call someone up and say, “Hey! I’m happy!” (Nah, that might not go over so well… LOL the reply would be like, “Are you high?”) LOL. Oh well. I pray you all have a fun safe day and tommorrow and that you all find yourselves and are able to keep them close at your side. The last thing we need is a bunch of selves running around the place. Well I believe that’s all I have to say about today. So…
-Good Tidings Everyone-
((((COREY))))) CO CO CO!!!!!
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Wow… yesterday was really bad for me… I scare myself sometimes… oh well. Today is another day, and it was alot better too, except for me being sick, I was running a bit of a fever this morning and decided to stay at home. It was probably good for me, I needed a day off.
Well, now that I feel half way decent… back to school tommorrow! Woo Hoo… No MSN still… I cannot figure that crap out! I hope I’m feeling as I am now tommorrow. I get depressed very easily now and I really don’t like it. I think I scared Grant yesterday with it too. I’ll fall inside myself and not be as social. Things get to me too easily! Hopefully I’ll be able to get over this real soon. I don’t like to be that way, it’s not me.
I’d have to say the only bad thing about feeling better today is that I’m going to feel bad again tommorrow evening. I have a meeting with my social worker again at 5:00. That’s where I have to relive all the bad things in my life over and over and over and over again! I can’t sleep when that happens, I’ll stay up for like 2 hours going over it all in my head. Tyler tells me just to forget all of it. That would probably help, but when you have somebody that is there to make you relive it or just one thing that triggers those thoughts again, it can real hard at times… IDK… life sucks for us all sometimes, maybe in different degrees according to the person, but it still happens.
Well happy thoughts everyone- take a deep breath and live today and stop remembering the day before. Look ahead of you and not behind you. That goes for me too. I need to start thinking about brighter things in my life instead of thinking about the darker side to things. I’ll see most of you later and to those of you I don’t have a pleasant time in the meanwhile!
-A toute a leur-
COREY
